Friend

Today, by God’s grace, I’ve solved a mystery that lasted for more than a month and found a HUGE answer to my question that has been bordering me thus far.

Three things that I’ve learned:-

1. Continue to be opened, COMMUNICATION
2. Someone has to admit her/his mistake
3. Both parties must have the willingness to share then there’s an opportunity to learn from each other, understand each other’s boundaries and be friend again.
   

Anyway, talking about friends. Today my colleagues and I had a good time talking about the topic ‘friends’. We had a great discussion about friends and right now I have my personal view about friends.

How many friends do you have? Good friends? Best friends?

I have quite a number of friends. I make effort to keep in touch with them and with the advanced communication systems today, writing email with 2 lines of message can be done less than 5 minutes. Agree? In fact, I’m really thankful to have Internet because with one click, you get to chat with your friends on MSN. We do not need to sit down and write letters and get a pigeon to send it away. On the other hand, some might think that using handwritten mails are more meaningful. To me, the thought counts. If I miss someone, I click on that person’s name on my MSN list or my email address, I’ll drop a line or two to the person.

Good friends? I have a few good friends. Friends come in various seasons. We are given the opportunity to know new friends in various places and seasons, in university, college, work place, ex-workplace, or even friends that we get to know when we go on a short holidays despite the fact that tour holidays only last for 4 days. The most important thing is we spend the moments together, e.g. laughing, sharing, chatting, exchanging information, discussing and so on. When I was in college, I have college mates and when I move onto university, I have more guy friends because I was doing an engineering degree. To balance up, I have gal friends in the hostel.

Best friend or best friends?

Personally I find that there’s nothing wrong to have x number of best friends or only ONE best friend. More importantly, ask yourself ‘Why you consider he/she as your best friend?’ Evaluate yourself why you come to the conclusion that you only have one best friend or why you have x number of best friends. Will you be able to sacrifice yourself for your best friend or even good friend.

I’ll share about my moments with one of my good friends. I hope that she won’t mind. Her name is A. We knew each other since we entered secondary school. I found myself really grow when I was in secondary school. Because during teenage period, we want to behave like adults with matured thinking and we’re more realistic, we’re no longer in the world of ‘I don’t want to speak with you today’ or ‘I don’t want to friend you’. We spent most of our recess time together, she is tall and I’m short. Tall + short = (I also don’t know). *mind you I like to write equations due to my research background* We sought understanding by giving opportunities to each other. Sometimes when we get into bad mood (due to hormone changes), I upset her and vice versa. But no matter what, we are good friends. We keep in touch thru emails and texts as we study and work in different place. We share our problems when we get the chance to meet each other. We laugh together, we go thru the hardships. Thru out this almost 15 years of friendship, we know each other’s characters pretty well. From my end, I claim to know her well. I don’t expect her to know me well, but she’s one of the few persons that know my taste. Anyway, don’t put our standard on others and don’t put expectations on others. So, we shout on the phone and talk really loud, sort out some misunderstandings, then we come to conclusion then we are still friends. From misunderstandings and giving the chance to be friend, we know each other’s boundaries and what are the ‘NOTs’ and what the ‘YESes’. Until today, we’re still good friends.

Via internet services, I manage to find some high schoolmates and once in a while, we drop two lines to each. The basic things are ‘how are you?’ ‘Alright, have to work and focus, take care, ta!’

Talking about genre, women are sensitive and emotional mammals, we put in more effort to keep friendship going. That’s why women are linked to being information exchange for guys.